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Friday, February 26, 2010


Distorted words are like Picasso paintings they say nothing and yet they tell you everything about the state of mind of the person who is speaking them.  Ferris wheels and mis-spelled words, broken glass, shattered dreams, looking for ice cream.  A bottle on it's side, who gets kissed next?  Anyone for a game of chess? Cheesecrackers telling time. The clock will never turn to nine.  Looking for a world your own there is no right or wrong. Or Mr. Clean to wipe it up.  There are times to weep and smelly feet.  Unfelt hugs and tattered rugs.  Mistakes at doing laundry and all you have left is tie-die.

© 2010

Friday, February 19, 2010

Thursday, February 18, 2010


At the center of your being 
you have the answer;
you know who you are 
and you know what you want


Tuesday, February 16, 2010

God Winks

My favorite books are the ones that offer insight instead of answers. Challenges instead of cop outs.  Books that make me think, question and look within.  For the most part I am like Tom Cruise in Cocktail, I always have a self-help book on me.  Only now it's on my kindle for iphone.

I don't just read the book either.  I call it doing the book.  If there are exercises, I am doing them. I keep a pen and paper handy and I get down to it. I answer honestly and I open myself up to the messages and possibilities.  When you trust in the process it's like leaning over a cliff and knowing that you won't fall. Really look around and heed the advice hidden in the most obscure of places.  These answers are gifts.  Big beautiful gifts wrapped in coincidences that come in all shapes and sizes.

I've been doing this book called When God Winks by, Squire Rushnell. It's a loaner from a friend and I am madly in love with this book. The philosophy behind God Winks is that every time a coincidence happens in your life, it is God winking at you.  Translation.  You are on your right path and everything around you is supporting you on your journey.  

You see I LOVE coincidences.  I even keep a coincidence journal from time to time because it helps me appreciate my life and all the good I receive.  

It's been slow for me in the freelance world.  I have had three jobs go away and as you can imagine my first instinct was to panic.  To freak out and stress over where my next job was was coming from.  But then I realized something and the evidence started to unfold around me in a series of  God Winks.  

My sister and I had been talking about a business adventure together for just over a month. While doing my book one night. I had an epiphany.  I went to sleep that night with a smile on my face and I woke with an even bigger one.  I got on the computer and started doing research.  To move the story ahead... I had my moments of doubt but everywhere I looked for a sign telling me that I was making the right choices the signs were there to guide me.  Here's a very interesting example.  One of many but the one I am choosing to share.  It was a real eye opener for me.  

I was so annoyed Saturday afternoon. My information wasn't coming fast enough and I was at my wits end with everything I had to do.  I was stressed out, I was tired and I was questioning whether I could even do this endeavor at all. 

Gahl Sasson had a scheduled seminar, The Alchemy of Relationships based on his new book, The Cosmic Navigator and I really wanted to go. I had been looking forward to it for 3 week.  I invited a friend and we decided to car pool.  On the drive over, I was expressing my doubts and letting them get the best of me.  My friend was be very supportive and telling me "You can do it, I know you can".  I wondered.

As I exhaled a sigh I turned my head to look out the window at the same exact time as a man holding a white bag with black lettering held it up over his face.  I remember thinking, that's odd, what is he doing? Is he hiding?" When I realized that simultaneously with the thought I was reading the black lettering, which left me saying in my head, "I can do it".

I was instantly rejuvenated!  I look at my friend with the biggest smile and I said, Oh My God.. God just winked at me!

I heeded the advice and now I am seriously and diligently pursuing this endeavor.  Because I am on my right path, I am experiencing more and more gifts of coincidences.  The first 3 went unnoticed until now.  And they were the biggest ones.  If any of those 3 jobs would have booked, I wouldn't be where I am in this moment.

I hope God winks at you today too.

© 2010

Friday, February 12, 2010



© 2010

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Let's Be

On Februrary 14th we will come into the Chinese New Year.  The Year of the Tiger. And this New Year is said to be a year of bravery.

Tigers are highly adaptable, territorial and are mostly solitary.  But of the nine subspecies of tigers, three are extinct and the other six are endangered.

In honor of the Tiger I propose that we all live up to the year and face our challenges courageously.  Let's be brave in our endeavors.  Unwavering in our intentions and honest in our exchanges.  

Let's remember to be gracious but independent.  Let's have tolerance and let us practice patience.  Let's be risk takers and embrace the excitement life has to offer.  Let's be attractive to our beholders and conscious in our decisions.  

Everything we do has a direct effect on someone, something, somewhere.  Let's stand up for what we believe in.  Know that it does take one person doing one thing to make a difference.  To create a movement.  To alter the path of global consciousness.  

Let's not act hastily and remember to be sympathetic to others.  Let us live not vicariously through the lives of our great leaders but take action in supporting their intentions.  Let us be the best versions of ourselves.  Let us express our individuality but come together as a group. 

Let's be fearless, heroic, bold, daring, adventurous, loving, kind, joyous, happy, sympathetic, empathetic, powerful, grateful, humble, successful, thankful, appreciative, and brave.

© 2010

Tuesday, February 9, 2010


Once upon a time I knew first hand what it was like to let the world get the best of me.  Let the world get the best of me?  Doesn’t that sound so BIG?  No wonder I felt small and insignificant.  In the schematic my mind had drawn for me, how could I not feel small? 

So there were days when I made the world shrink down to my size.  My comfort zone was a small space in the center of my bed under two layers of blankets.  I would lay there as if in a body size igloo.  I would lay there for days.  Sometimes four days straight. Barely eating and barely breathing with only my tears to keep me company. 

So many lost days, missed opportunities and sunsets unseen. 

One day not long after my mother died I hit my proverbial rock bottom.  I fell out of bed onto the floor and I just lay there.  I had a vision of laying in my own proverbial gutter.  I could feel the dirty musty water against my face and I could smell every bad thing that ever happened to me wafting out of that water.  I was stuck. I was paralyzed as the gutter held me like ratchet straps and all I could do was lay there. 

I had nothing left.  It was over.  I wasn’t even sure if I was breathing.  So I gave in.  In that moment of terrorized paralysis I gave myself over to whatever higher power would take me.  In a silent whisper I asked for help.  For the first time in my life I truly and unconditionally prayed for my own salvation.

The next thing I knew a hand came out of nowhere reaching for me, helping me out of the proverbial gutter and lifting me back up into consciousness. I could feel the presence of something greater than me.  Someone lifted me off the floor that day but I was sitting by myself with tear stains on my face staring at the floor beneath my feet as I was now sitting on my bed.

I have never forgotten that day.  And I have never again sought the comfort of my blanket igloo.  It was time to change.  Time to step into my own life and view my world as it was meant to be viewed or measured.  To make it a life worth living.

One of the hardest things in the world is to admit when your life isn’t working.  It is said that we do the same things again and again even if it hurts us or depletes us because it is all we know.  So the payoff (even the painful ones) are still payoffs. I don’t know about you but this sounds to me like the definition of insanity.  Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome.  Well, it’s time for a different outcome.

The outcomes of our lives are born from our choices.  The choices that we make about how we want things to go.  We choose to give up or to persevere.  We choose to be afraid of heights and we choose to love deep sea diving.  We choose which path we will walk and we choose which songs we will dance too.  We choose who to love and sometimes we choose to let love choose for us. 

We are constantly making choices whether we realize it or not.  Consciously and subconsciously in every moment we are making a choice about something.  About everything. 

The key is to take control of your choices thus taking control of your life.  And how do we do this?  Just think! Think before we speak. Think before we react. Think before we make our choices. 

I find myself making a lot of choices.  The choice to communicate better, to take care of my body, and to be optimistic in my intentions.  The choice to live my life to my true potential, to help people see that they are not alone in their struggles, and to live a life without drama.  My choices are filled with love.  But, I have also made the choice to respect my sadness and not let it get the best of me.  I have made the choice to listen more than I speak and my choice to learn life’s lessons keeps me very busy indeed.  My choice to share with others and to be humble but determined is invigorating.  My choice to make a difference is challenging but I embrace it.  My choice to care leaves me vulnerable but I am okay with that now.  My choice to ask for help if I need it is a scary prospect but I shall fear the fear and do it anyway.  My outcome is my definitive commitment to know that I always have a choice.

What choices are you making?  How are they effecting your life?  The lives of the people around you?  Your relationships?  Your careers?  Your happiness?  

© 2010

Monday, February 8, 2010


Wonderments of intrigue like a childish crush, music plays a symphony and I just can’t get enough.  Strengths of the violin overtake the harp. All the while I think of you in a single moments hush.  The serenity of a rose quartz crystal ball. Sitting peacefully with just a smile,  the water fall flows in tranquility.  Dr. seuss landings of a sacred space and a mothers life is not forgotten.  The world is filled with starlight and I feel shy.  A dog barks in the distance and a baby softly cries.  Sleep doesn’t find me now so I am willful and  awake.  Sadness has no hold on me but I wish to see your face.  Black onyx  to release memories of a past, just a girl with glistening eyes who knew it wouldn’t last.  How doest thou think of me if ever that you do?  The crescent moon watches protectively and I do so miss the snow.  My eccentric Aquarius nature that I presume you already know.  A lightening storm over the stillest of lakes and I can still see the fireflies.  Sparklers on my birthday cakes, and memories of my pretty mothers smiles.  Just a few distant thoughts of being happy as a child.  Time heals all wounds and brings the oceans breeze.  Now I sit quietly getting sleepy and I’m at peace.  An unfinished painting stands by as the candles scent envelops me. Who shall play Brahms’ lullaby so that sleep can find me easily.  Will thy dreams come to me tonight and hold me?   Will I find you there?

© 2010

Saturday, February 6, 2010


A power connection and we are the sky… not the clouds going by.  What will you ask of your mirror that you say that I am?  Will you let your fears cloud it like the steam from a shower or will you embrace it?  Feel the fear and do it anyway.  The past has a hold on you on you but you didn’t know.  It’s where you’ve been living and couldn’t let go.  How could you embrace change if you don’t change the fears that stop you?  If you leap the net will appear.  When life tries to get the best of you remember me.  The way I made you laugh when you thought you didn’t want to.  How were we to know that I could push your buttons?  Did our intuition fail us?  Or did we call out for each other?  Was there a lesson we were supposed to learn but we missed class that day?  When someone leaves us it is the Universe giving us a gift.  When we let them go with love and forgiveness that is our way of saying Thank You.  When we least expect it and someone joins us… our acceptance is allowing the Universe to say You Are Very Welcome.   Basking in memories I write, I smile, I think of all that has passed.  My friends, my lovers, the male versions of myself.  I choose a journey into the future.  In peace, in light and in laughter.  Take the leap now.  Join me on the new vibrational level where if you listen you can hear me… It is there that we will continue our beautiful conversations… it is here that we will always remain friends.

© 2010

Friday, February 5, 2010


The rain has rendered me thoughtful.  Contemplative about the past.  Pensive in my memories. The happy ones.  The ones filled with love and joy and family trips. The moments when my mother laughed and my sister and I dressed in our matching outfits. The butterfly patches she made and her ever changing spiritual journey.  The nights I watched her dance ballet in the dark in our living room and she didn't know I was there.  The sound of her voice singing along to Steely Dan or when she danced around the kitchen to Neil Diamond.  She was young.  She was beautiful.  But she was lost, and sad, and lonely and in the end she was gone.  I wrote this for her.  Maybe, where ever she is she can hear me.  I miss her.

I spent time with you last eve while my eyes wept and I took your hand in sleep. I basked in you and all that the past allowed us only to have you wake briefly gasping for breath. In that moment my heart knew you would not stay with me. Confusion rendered me to my knees for I could no longer hold court for both of us. I had to let you go. I knew that you must find what you are searching for in your life after death.  That which does not include me. My heart must rest for I cannot be a part of ever knowing you this way. And now. You have long since left thee.  Farewell.

© 2010

Feeling the love and they say it best....

The Beatles

Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game
It's easy.
There's nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that can't be saved.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you
in time - It's easy.

All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
There's nothing you can know that isn't known.
Nothing you can see that isn't shown.
Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be.
It's easy.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
All you need is love (all together now)
All you need is love (everybody)
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Beckoning Call

I am feeling very inspired today and I find myself sitting here again with a little more to say. So I figured I might as well share with you who mean the most to me... Enjoy and I hope you are all having a love filled day.

I spent my youth by the waters edge
Immersed in a prayer that you would find thee
Waiting patiently as the years passed by
I began to wonder if you could hear me

Would you listen to my beckoning call
Or would I wonder aimlessly without you
Perhaps I was just a hopeless romantic
And you were never really supposed to

But if we inherently believe in miracles
To the entire world we must profess
That anything is possible and
So we adhere to its bequests

There is someone for everyone
And this I hold true
From the bottom of my heart
I have waited patiently for you

I thought that I was dreaming
When you walked through the door
The first time our eyes embraced
And I knew I wanted more

Years would pass with more encounters
Yet never a word of happenstance
We would always just walk away
Leaving our connections to chance

How ironic that you should find me now
Within reach of your similar path
Only time can reveal the truth
If there’s such a thing as our other half

© 2010

The Wonderment of a Child

The beauty of viewing the world as it is being seen thru the eyes of a child means possessing the gift of seeing everything for the first time over and over.  Seeing in color, comparing shapes, wondering at the smallest insect as it carries 10 times it’s weight. 

Trying things for the first time.  Taking your first step and it holds you up.  How exciting!  We take new first steps everyday.  Embrace them.  Recognize them.  We step into a new job, into a new relationship, into the unknown.  We step into new decisions, new directions, and new philosophies. Life is full of beautiful surprises. Look up but don’t forget to occasionally glance at where you are stepping.  Look forward but periodically take a glance in your rear view.   Take account of where you’ve been.  Contemplate where you are.  Find appreciation for all the steps you have taken.  Whether they took you forward or they took you back. It’s in the two steps back process that we are given a second opportunity to find the treasure we missed the first time. 

Be in constant contact with your inner child and you shall know an unconditional, courageous, determination to take it all in.  Take a look.  See things for the first time.  The ocean at it’s calmest with its glass like surface will show you yourself if you let it.  An overnight storm will create forty foot waves bringing unprecedented excitement to the surfer riding the tube.  The glaciers of Alaska over the bluest of waters covered under ice are like something of fairytales and tinker bells.   The sound of a plane becomes a reminder of someone who is going to visit a long lost friend.   The Himalayas inspire the climber to reach beyond any limitations. Large thousand year old trees that stand majestic with history.  Your first box of shrinky-dink’s.

Listen to your life and the energy that surrounds you because it has so much to say.  This ever-present approach shall lead to coincidences that leave you feeling extremely connected to the world.   Having undeniable faith that the world will give you what you ask of it so you are careful what you ask for.   Whenever you see a dandelion, make a wish.  Find the love and empathy in our exchanges with strangers because they can’t.  Being able to take a deep breath, lend a helping hand and share a smile with a neighbor.  Look around you at least once a day and say "Thank You So Much".  Give respect to a child so he may hold on to his free will just a little bit longer.  Being thankful and gracious and showing gratitude for the little things will keep you smiling all day long.  Being humble and open to new possibilities will find you going with the flow of this ever-changing thing that we call life.  

Appreciate all that has come before.  Yet live in your intention for the future and you shall find yourself embracing what is now.  This precious moment is a gift. Our present.

When we live in our moments we have found true love and it is with this love that all things will grow and the birds will spread their wings and the flowers will bloom and you will live to your true potential.

There is no gift greater that we can give ourselves, then the gift of living with the wonderment of a child.

© 2010

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Choose Yes

You know how sometimes when you loose something, you become beside yourself with grief trying to find it. You keep looking for it even in places you know it can’t possibly be. Is this what we do when we are looking for someone? Could that be why sometimes we end up with the wrong person? We were looking in the wrong place to begin with?

But where is the right place and when do we know it’s the right person? How do we let go of that which is not right for us? How do we accept the person that is? How do we let go of the things that were instilled in us as kids? Why is it so much easier to believe negative criticism than high praise? Why did we believe that? Why do we seek out what will help us escape and give us false hope and happiness for a night? Why do we not believe in ourselves when everyone around us believes in us? What is it they see that we don’t see? Is it possible to turn it around? To turn ourselves around and see that we are made from greatness?

Let’s choose yes. Let’s speak in the first person and speak with intention. Let’s make these statements emphatically and let’s keep saying them over and over until they become a part of us. Isn’t our own encouragement worth a few minutes of the day? The time is now. Let’s say this loud and clear.

“I believe in me.  I know implicitly, that I have a realm of possibilities at my disposal and I know utterly and completely that I am capable of so much.  I set my goals high and I follow through with conviction. I am here to serve and I lead by example. I owe it to myself and to everyone around me, to live up to my true potential.  I know that I hold the secret to my own success.  It is my turn to shine.  I am very deserving.  I can afford it and I accept all the riches that life has to offer.  I welcome and accept the beauty of life.  I trust and therefore attract and accept trustworthy people in my life.  I let go wholeheartedly of my limiting beliefs.  I release them.  I am brave and courageous and willing and able. I embrace my opportunities with the respect they deserve.  I am beautiful and I am loved.” 

© 2010

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Help is on the Way

Dear God, Universe, Higher Consciousness,

May you find it in your heart to help us find our true path.  Help the greedy to be humbled and help the poor for they are so many.  Please see us all through any times of hardship and despair.  May everyone have food on their tables, love for their children and roofs over their heads.  Though we may encounter conflict, strife or sorrow please help everyone to believe in themselves, each other and a bigger picture of possibilities.  May we lose our interest in power and instead find the joy in sharing.  May we give love to all whom we meet and extend a helping hand.  Let us know that a smile for a stranger goes a long way and a word of encouragement to a child can change the course of their future. Please let us not look down to those we perceive as below us, for we no not their circumstance. Let us remember that we are all creations of time and space and we can be gone tomorrow.  Please help us to persevere through our most challenging obstacles.  Guide us so that we may shine our light down the darkest of alleyways.  Please assist us on our path so that we may offer opportunities to those who are less fortunate.   Please help corporate America restructure to create more jobs.  May you have faith in us that we may have faith in ourselves.  Please channel your energy through us so that we may be pathfinders for the future, proper guidance for the youth, and patience for the old that may have forgotten who they are.  Please help the leaders of the world.  Help them lead by example by pursuing peace, help them turn the global economy around, and please assist us so that the lands of war may find peace.  Please help us all help each other so that we may get through these arduous times and uplift the energy on a level of global consciousness.  May we all find peace, love, good health and prosperity.  May we wake each morning with love in our hearts, smiles on our faces, encouragement in our words and sincerity in our souls.  

May we disparage fear from our lives and evolve consciously as a whole.  Please help us to experience love, compassion and empathy toward our fellow man, woman and child.  Help us to greet each day with love in our hearts, be the master of our emotions, know we are nature's greatest miracle, and to live each day as if it were our last. 

With undeniable faith, I ask this for all of us in gratitude...


© 2010

Words on Screen & Words on Paper

  • Blink, Malcolm Gladwell
  • Casablanca (1942)
  • Chocolat (2000)
  • Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, Susan Jeffer, Ph.D.
  • Harold and Maude (1971)
  • Invictus (2009)
  • On The Waterfront (1954)
  • Singin in the Rain (1952)
  • The Celestine Prophecy, James Redfield
  • The Four Agreements, Miguel Ruiz
  • The Greatest Salesman in the World, Og Mandino
  • The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle
  • The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, Deepak Chopra
  • The Shawshank Redemption (1994)
  • The Tao of Pooh, Benjamin Hoff
  • The Wizard of Oz (1939)
  • West Side Story (1961)
  • What Happy People Know, Dan Baker


  • Use Somebody, Kings of Leon
  • You're Beautiful, James Blunt
  • Love, Love, Love, Tristan Prettyman
  • Just Fine, Mary J. Blige
  • Banana Pancakes, Jack Johnson
  • You and Me, Dave Matthews
  • Just Breathe, Pearl Jam